The Unbearable Dichotomy of Christmas

Words are sometimes inadequate.

Okay, we admit we're at a loss as how to intellectually reconcile this whimsical holiday tabletop decoration with anything even remotely resembling rationality, but that doesn't mean your family and friends won't be able to reap scads of joy and inspiration from its perplexing variation on Christ's nativity! 

We're sure that the moment this carefully mass-produced depiction of Santa™ genuflecting over the Baby Jesus takes up residence in your home you'll begin to wonder if Kris Kringle's sleigh, in addition to its ability to fly, is also capable of time travel . . . which would certainly appear to be the case with this delightful chronologically incongruous Jolly Old Elf™ in the manger!

At this special time of year, you'll no doubt want to pause in reverence for a moment to ponder what prayers might be tumbling from the lips of this red-suited icon of consumerism. Our own household members speculate that St. Nick is likely offering some sort of mumbled apology to the newborn Savior, while at the same time asking that glad tidings be delivered unto future generations of corporate holiday marketing focus-groups and pepper spray-armed shoppers alike, whose ability to completely miss the point will keep the Christmas reindeer flying high for years to come.

Look at their faces. Look at their faces!

Don't pass up this chance to add another inexplicable artifact to your child's already cumbersome burden of theological questions! Enhance their confusion and make an investment in years of future psychological counseling while simultaneously doing your small part to increase the trade deficit by purchasing this imported plasticine tribute to the Christmas Spirit™ today!

Regularly $70

HOLIDAY SPECIAL: $63.50!

Don't delay! Supplies are mercifully limited!
(Hand-painted in Indonesia)