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| Your time has come |
In stores now! Not only will this stylish and state-of-the-art clock keep track of the ever-dwindling moments of your life, it will also project them in enormous, bright numerals onto the ceiling of what should be a relaxing sanctuary from life's challenges: your own bedroom.
It's the perfect nighttime accessory for insomniacs! Why make that extra effort of rolling over on one side to squint at an ordinary alarm clock to see what time it is now when you can simply stare, wide-awake, at the ceiling and calculate how many hours of sleep you could theoretically get by on if you could only just doze off either very soon, or at 4 AM . . . whichever comes first.
But wait, there's more!
Not only does this technological marvel beam the passage of time onto the ceiling, but also the current temperature of both the indoor and outdoor environments of your pre-dawn world. No more guesswork! Now you'll be able to tell at a glance if you will soon be dragging your exhausted body out of bed to face the icy embrace of yet another bitterly cold morning, or the early promise of an oppressively hot summer day.
Additional features include the ability to pick the alarm sound you'd rather have alert you to the fact that any brief engagement with sleep you may have had is now over. Select from: "Prison Break Siren," "Enraged Mechanical Bird," "Cascading Pots & Pans," "Incessant Maddening Buzz," or "Chorus of Jackhammers." You can also choose the built-in AM/FM radio option, if you'd prefer to be startled out of your sleepless reverie by irksome popular music or the strident voice of your favorite talk radio show host.
This fantastic clock is also programed with a choice of six soothing sounds of nature that you can listen to in a futile attempt to lull yourself into sleep while fantasizing that you're relaxing on the sand of a "Pacific Island Beach" you'll probably never visit, or surrounded by insects in a "Peaceful Woodland Clearing." Other nature sounds include: "Ceaseless Rain," "Howling Coyote Serenade," "Unnerving Jungle Noises," and "Vaguely Electronic-sounding Waterfall."
Don't wait a moment longer, for as you well know, time is running out! Don't let another night of fretful tossing and turning go by without this functional and elegant nightstand companion. Start dwelling on the relentless march of time tonight, and get yours today!
Available in finer mall kiosks and major department stores everywhere.
